Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1998 9:53:35 -0400
From: Kenneth Nagle
Subject: Kabuki Inn

: >& who can pass up the added bonus of Kabuki sleeping on your head?!?!?!
: That should cost extra...  : )

Here at the Kabuki Inn, we strive to make your stay as pleasurable as possible- if for some reason you are dissatisfied, just let one of our staff know- they will instantly drug you, throw you in the trunk of their car, and leave your naked body in a field where you will wander for days until the police finally find you and nobody will ever believe your story that you did not have complete satisfaction at the Kabuki Inn- in fact, you will probably not remember that you ever stayed with us.

If you are hungry, be sure to ask for our local list of restaurants, most of which will no longer exist, or if they do exist, probably don't serve your kind anyways.

We have free cocktails every evening- feel free to be hung over the next day.

Our staff can direct you to the large number of nightspots in the Washington area which are available to young people, and explain why you will not ant to go to any of them, unless of course you openly carry a machete.

Mingle with the other guests and staff in our main sitting area to play games, most of which require a competitive spirit and small firearms.


We hope you enjoy your stay and fuc^H^H^Hthank you for choosing the Kabuki Inn.